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Published: March 20th, 2017
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While not widely found in Europe, drug testing is a fact of life in the United States. Regular drug testing, either to apply for a job or during employment, became a fact of life during the late 1980’s and has remained a facet of employment ever since. Over half of all workplaces employ drug testing at some point – although the vast majority of those, unless employed in the transportation industry, are given before the worker shows up for their first day on the job.
Sadly, even after states began legalizing cannabis for either medical or recreational use, workers can still lose a job or be considered “unsuitable” for employment in the first place after testing positive to a drug deemed “illegal.”
Most drug testing takes place before employment begins. For that reason, if unemployed and offered a new position, be prepared to cease your drug consumption well before you start. Most employees in “drug free” workplaces also know that they will be subjected to drug testing on a schedule. Despite the fact that companies that employ drug testing, tend to threaten to do this on a surprise, immediate, and on-the-spot basis, they almost never do (again, unless employed in the transportation industry), because most also send you to a facility rather than perform such testing on site.
Commercial drug testing labs and certified technicians test for all “illegal” drugs, which include amphetamines, cocaine, MDMA (Ecstasy), opiates and of course both real and synthetic cannabinoids.
If you take a prescription drug (other than medical marijuana), you should also bring proof of the legitimate prescription from a doctor to the testing facility to prove, that you are legitimately allowed to use drugs whose metabolite will show up if tested. Employers are not allowed to not hire you (or fire you) if you are taking Adderall for diagnosed Attention Deficit Disorder (for example), which will show up in your urine as an amphetamine. People who take Dronabinol legitimately can also produce a doctor’s note for the same, because Dronabinol shows up differently in tests than cannabis and as of 2010, Dronabinol became a legitimate Schedule III drug.
Most drug testing that occurs, particularly in the United States, is performed on urine, rather than hair, blood or saliva.
If you are using marijuana however (even if medically) and stopping usage is not possible (i.e. you are using the drug for medicinal purposes), or ingested another kind of drug, that still will not pass muster within a short time before the impending test, there are a few tried and true tactics to make sure you pass with flying colours. Methods to passing a drug test include everything from detoxing to using fake urine. No matter which route you decide to take, you should still be prepared and practice which method you are going to employ.
The one surefire thing NEVER to do is add a household product to your urine sample, like bleach or detergent. This will make you fail automatically.
The most fool-proof way to pass a urine test is to not use your own. This means obtaining a real urine sample from someone else you know has clean urine or using fake urine. As long as you hand over urine or fluid with the same chemicals that occur in urine that is also warm (body temperature), you are in essence handing over the same fluid that the labs use to calibrate their systems. The best synthetic urine kits also come with a powder that is sprinkled in it to heat the substance automatically.
Other kits will come with heating pads and testing strips. Some users just prewarm their samples in the microwave for about 10 seconds and then place the samples near the skin and under clothing in a reliably warm place (such as under a bra or in the armpit under a shirt) until they hand in their sample.
Obviously, however, using and passing off fake urine takes practice. And while many drug testing facilities do not observe you in the process of making the sample, there are those that do. In these cases, you can also find products (such as fake penises, that also pass urine) to aid your efforts.
That said, if this level of deception is required, it is best to consider whether you really want this job in the first place, not to mention the stress and expense required to maintain the illusion.
The best way to pass a drug test is to clean your system of evidence of the drug metabolite. This means literally flushing your system if facing a urine test. Some people rely on plain old water or herbal tea, although this also takes both time to work and means you should avoid a drug test first thing in the morning as all metabolites in your system will be much more detectable in a sample taken early in the day. You should also exercise as much as you can and eat healthily before the test.
Others, particularly without time to prepare, rely on commercially available detox drinks (also found online), which work much faster – sometimes in as much as an hour. Some people report using detox drinks successfully right before submitting to a urine test. Again, this is not a method you should employ without testing it thoroughly beforehand. Some detox drinks also work not just on urine, but on blood as well. You can also check online or in health stores to find shampoos, that will rid hair of drug metabolites.
When you rely on any “detox” method, particularly for an employment screening, you should also buy a reliable testing kit to see if your detox method is working reliably.
Sometimes even the best detox efforts fail – particularly if your urine is too weak, because you have successfully diluted your urine to the point, that testers are suspicious. In these cases, you can ask for a retest, but then you can be sure, that the testing conditions will be more stringent. Under no circumstances should you use any illicit substance in the period between the first and second test. Just continue your detox efforts.